We should probably make it very clear we have no intention to make light of the dangers pro cyclists risk every time they pin a race number on, but the fact remains there have been more than a few (thankfully serious injury-free) bizarre crashes over the years that would be better suited to You've Been Framed than GCN+...
Just the other month, for example, when Julian Alaphilippe was taken down in a fall caused, in part, by the driver of his own team car...
It must have been an awkward dinner table that night...
Sticking with this season, and even more bizarre, was Kevin Geniets getting taken out by a race sponsors' board at Paris-Nice, as he rode to sign on for the final stage. Geniets wasn't lucky enough to escape injury-free and abandoned shortly after rejoining his teammates on the startline.
Or how about Eduard Prades celebrating a 'win' at the Tour of the Hellas, only for his saddle to come off, throwing him to the ground...smooth...at least he won though? Well, actually, he didn't realise there was a rider up the road and was sprinting for second...ouch.
It wouldn't be a bizarre crash round-up without Froome on Ventoux, would it? More bizarre for what followed than the crash itself, but when crowds poured onto the lower slopes after the stage finish was moved from the summit due to high winds, it caused major fan congestion. In the mess, a motorbike couldn't get through and blocked the thin slither of road without fans. Cue Richie Porte and Froome slamming into the back of it and ending up on the deck.
With the team car far behind...well, the rest is history...
So you know how tomorrow afternoon, around 4pm perhaps, your thoughts will be turning to that first cold beverage of the weekend? Well, I've got an idea...
Maybe you should join us for 'Drink at your desk Friday' with...James May, where Liam and Dave talked about his lifelong love of cycling, his favourite bikes past and present, and the common mistake many bike riders make that he believes should see transgressors "put in prison."
We've given you a sneak peek below of what to expect...
> James May: “I can’t stand road sectarianism – it’s all b*llocks”
4pm Friday on our YouTube channel for the full interview...cold ones are optional (but hey, it's the weekend, you deserve it)...
Pro cycling teams love a sponsor shout-out. I mean, fair enough, they fund the bill-paying and chain-lubing...
However, we do love to take the piss out of some of the more bizarre shoehorned sponsor name drops...and boy do we have one for you this afternoon.
World Champion @alafpolak1 has undergone further examinations at the hospital in Herentals, which have revealed that the pneumothorax he suffered as a result of the crash three weeks ago has completely healed, meaning he is able to resume light training on a set of @tacx rollers. pic.twitter.com/YrfyPWFoZl
— Quick-Step Alpha Vinyl Team (@qst_alphavinyl) May 12, 2022
Firstly and foremostly, it's great that the world champion is back on his (Specialized) bike. See what I did there? I'm sure Patrick Lefevere's Tour de France plans are extremely grateful...however, Quick-Step Alpha Vinyl's update does suggest a doctor somewhere sat Julian down and prescribed Tacx roller work only...
"I'm sorry, Julian. Your body is not strong enough for Elite or Wahoo just yet. For people with your injuries, I always prescribe Tacx..."
the Doctors specifically said only @tacx rollers and nothing else 🤣
But seriously, super news. 💪💪💪
— Joe (@joehenstridge) May 12, 2022
😘#Giro@MarkCavendish@qst_alphavinylpic.twitter.com/5prw5ph846
— Giro d'Italia (@giroditalia) May 12, 2022
What's happened on stage six of the Giro? Absolutely nothing of note...
Sorry to disappoint, we're still living off yesterday's bizarre finish line crash. Diego Rosa has three minutes advantage but as sure as the Pope is a Catholic or bears relieve themselves in the woods (depending on if you ask Jens Voigt or not) we'll get a sprint of some sort in Scalea in roughly two and a half hours' time...until then you may as well forget the Giro's even happening...
We have movement at long last at the #Giro!
Looks like Diego Rosa drew the short straw on the @EoloKometaTeam Bus this morning#Giro105pic.twitter.com/pjiDSNBgBd
— GCN Racing (@GcnRacing) May 12, 2022
Diego Rosa isn't your usual breakaway cannon fodder on a Grand Tour sprint stage. Fine, he rides for EOLO-Kometa these days, but he's finished second at Il Lombardia, won Milan-Torino, finished eighth at the Critérium du Dauphiné and 10th at Liège–Bastogne–Liège.
Well, today he can forget all that...he's out alone for however long the peloton at the Giro d'Italia want to make him suffer. The 33-year-old went in the morning break, looked around, and quickly realised he was on his ones.
Might as well slow down to a touring pace and see if the bunch really want it all back together so soon...
Diego Rosa: pic.twitter.com/tWrI2FZZt6
— Thijs Zonneveld (@thijszonneveld) May 12, 2022
We regularly get sent 'studies' by a whole host of companies, essentially looking for a shout-out. Sometimes, naming no names *cough* me *cough*, people fall for them and might write a story titled, I don't know, off the top of my head, 'Where is Britain's safest and most dangerous city for cycling?' only to need to go back in and change pretty much everything to say the 'study's' logic was questionable at best...forgive me, my brain appeared to be in a hangover-induced state of shutdown on Sunday...
Well, today we've got another one in our inbox...'UK's most penalised drivers are in Bradford, Liverpool and Leeds, study reveals' which we quickly thought might sound better as...'UK's worst drivers that deserved to be punished are in Bradford, Liverpool and Leeds'.
Anyway, on closer inspection it included gems like: "Of the ten postcode areas with the highest percentage of licence holders with penalty points, eight are based in West Yorkshire, and two other postcode areas are in Merseyside."
road.cc translation: West Yorkshire Police and Merseyside Police are the two forces within whose areas drivers are most likely to have penalty points, most likely due to a combination of high levels of enforcement of traffic laws by roads policing units, local CPS offices proceeding with prosecution once a case is referred to them, and the specific approach taken to punishment by courts there.
Funny how that's not as catchy as most penalised drivers...
Another classic: "Drivers who want to avoid getting further penalty points on their licence may want to consider moving to a remote Scottish island though, as six of the ten postcode areas with the lowest penalty point to licence holder ratio are based in quiet island locations north of the English border."
So yeah, make of all that what you will...
People often escape in the night, using secondary roads, to bypass numerous Russian checkpoints, where one can be arbitrarily detained and disappear without trace. Sometimes they escape on bicycles: here's @berdynskykh_k photo of bikes left in Zelenodolsk,first 🇺🇦-controlled town pic.twitter.com/q9TXuDDYs3
— Olga Tokariuk (@olgatokariuk) May 11, 2022
To conclude the weekend's racing, we visit the site which featured in the 2021 Tour Series and 2016 Tour of Britain 🇬🇧
🗓️ 26 June
🚴 Road
📌 Castle Douglas
#NationalRoadChampionshipspic.twitter.com/hFpwf6llyK— British Cycling (@BritishCycling) May 11, 2022
British Cycling has released the routes of the National Road Championships to be raced between 23-26 June in Dumfries and Galloway. Based out of Castle Douglas the road races look like they'll be very flat affairs, with just 752m of climbing over 201km for the men, while the women will tackle 496m over 128km.
The 44km men's TT route has just 86m of elevation, while the women's single lap has 43m.
Let's just say anyone wanting a national champ's jersey this year will need some power...
(Disclaimer that this is a joke, I don't cycle on the pavement unless there's a mixed use path that makes sense to use)
— Caoimhe 🏳️⚧️🇮🇪🇬🇧💛🤍💜🖤 (@Caoimhe4now) May 11, 2022
I concur...that's why we need people like Chris to do it for us...
Chris Hall is something of a road.cc legend who almost broke the live blog in November 2020 after he brought a new insane climbing challenge to our attention — trenching. That day, he rode up (and importantly, down too) Box Hill 91 times until he'd climbed (and descended) the depth of the Mariana Trench. That's a whole 10,994m...although Chris did 11,870m, of course, during a 450km ride...
Then, last spring we reported the shocking story that Chris had called off his England-crossing charity ride from Land’s End in Cornwall (the most westerly point) to Ness Point in Lowestoft (the most easterly) after being pushed off his bike in Andover.
Thankfully, Chris returned later in the year to finish what he started, riding 700km across England in 29 hours...
Now he needs a new challenge and will be trying to complete seven Everestings in seven days. That's seven consecutive days of climbing 8,848m...just ask Liam how hard it is to do one...
Chris' latest epic will be raising awareness for mental health and funds for Movember, and gets underway on May 16. So...which hill is going to become etched on his mind forever? Answer? The stunning Llyn Stwlan Dam; with its tight hairpins and 9.7 per cent average gradient, it really is one of the most incredible climbs in the UK. No better place to grind up 61,936m...(that's 33 reps and 182km each day)...
Chris is inviting anyone who wants to help with a couple of reps to come along for moral support so, if you're in the area next week, feel free to drop by with some carbohydrates...
Jumbo-Visma's Giro d'Italia has gone from bad to worse...
Like a Monday morning. @OutOfCycling@JumboVismaRoadpic.twitter.com/J65NVmAlP1
— Carlo Gironi (@carlogironi) May 11, 2022
First it was Edoardo Affini getting dropped on a climb by a...cat?! Then Tom Dumoulin got pipped for stage two by Simon Yates. On the day up Etna, Dumoulin, Tobias Foss and Sam Oomen all lost significant GC time. And now, Oomen has been brought down by an over-zealous spectator looking for a souvenir.
The Dutch rider was rolling back to the team bus after yesterday's stage finish in Messina, when a fan stepped out to ask for a bottle. Channelling his inner Pascal Eenkhoorn, Oomen passed it over, only for the fan's bag to get caught on his bars, and cause a moment made for 'Out of Context Cycling'...
The fan seemed to take the impact harder than Oomen, cursing his luck...you can almost see the moment he realises he's going to be plastered all over the internet...'am I the real Opi-Omi?'
That’s Oppi for you
— Michael Scarisbrick (@ScarisbrickMike) May 12, 2022
Anyway, Jumbo-Visma said "at a first glance" their rider seems okay after the fall. Oh, and to top off the team's misfortune, young sprinter Olav Kooij won an impressive sprint victory on the opening stage of the Tour of Hungary, prompting many to bombard their social media accounts with messages about how they've picked the wrong team. Who'd want to be a DS in that team this morning?