“How to not die at the Foot of the Walk – A Guide”: Cyclists slam “misleading, death trap” layout on notorious cycle lane; Attack the traffic! Thomas Voeckler to voice driving navigation app during Tour de France + more on the live blog

Annemiek van Vleuten’s final season as a pro hasn’t been the smoothest one so far.

However, the 40-year-old’s (let’s call it tactically astute) victory over Demi Vollering at the Vuelta Femenina in May means that she’s still on course to win the Vuelta-Giro-Tour triple for the second year running.

And as Van Vleuten herself has noted, with the Vuelta stepping up to become a proper, week-long race for 2023, pulling off the grand tour treble this summer would even eclipse her historic feat from last year.

But with Vollering and SD Worx looking so ominously strong during the spring – and only a badly timed nature break away from the win at the Vuelta – things won’t be so easy for the legendary Dutchwoman.

Which is why Movistar have selected a very strong line-up to ensure that Van Vleuten retains her title at the upcoming Giro Donne, in what would be her fourth career triumph at the Italian race and part two of a possible pre-retirement stage racing treble.

Recently crowned German road race champion Liane Lippert, who looked strong throughout the spring classics, will join the world champion in Chianciano for the opening prologue of the tough nine-day race on Friday, along with Paula Patiño, Floortje Mackaij, Sara Martín, Aude Biannic, and Sheyla Gutiérrez.

While Netflix’s much-discussed Tour de France series has generated some intense debate within cycling circles over whether it was any good or not (a less intense, more gently rambling version of this debate can be found on the latest episode of the road.cc Podcast), it seems to have gone down well with the kind of right-wing writers for whom anti-cycling bingo is a daily pastime, believe it or not.

In the weekend’s Spectator – fresh from warning drivers about “vigilante cyclists”– James Delingpole submitted a glowing review, titled ‘Netflix has struck gold’, of Unchained, which he praised for its portrayal of the riders’ sheer toughness, the iconic scenery, the relatable personalities, the sport’s idiosyncratic traditions, and its exhilarating action.

(Though I would say that the series hasn’t improved Delingpole’s tactical analysis – note the reference to Tom Pidcock’s decision “to do most of his overtaking on the downhill sections”.)

Good overtaking there, Tom...

In any case, the series, Delingpole says is “making me warm to cycling” – but only the elite, Tour de France riding type of cyclists, not us commoners.

And he can’t resist throwing in a few anti-cycling bingo classics to make his point, either.

“I’m ideologically opposed to bicycles for all the obvious reasons,” he writes. “Still, after watching a few episodes of Tour de France: Unchained, I’ve softened my position slightly.

“Say what you like about those infuriating, car-impeding, road-hogging cyclists but the ones who participate in the big international races don’t half have some balls.”

Cheers James.

Maybe that’s the answer – after all these years of being abused for “riding like we’re in the Tour de France”, perhaps, thanks to Netflix, the one way to gain the respect of anti-cycling motorists is to, you know, look like we’re riding the Tour de France…

So Michael Mørkøv will be at Cav’s last TdF, at his last chance to win the 35th stage. A girl can dream, right? https://t.co/IqnsRUK3Bl

— Emma Bianchi #SiempreGino 🖤 (@cyclartist) June 27, 2023

Not sure how Fabio would feel about Mørkøv taking on the Geraint Thomas role during this year’s Tour, if I’m honest…

In one of the more bizarre announcements to come out this week in the lead-up to Saturday’s Grand Départ – and in news that will certainly delight French female motorists of a certain age – the Tour de France announced this morning that Thomas Voeckler will provide the voice of popular motoring navigation app Waze during this year’s race.

📢 @voecklerthomas lands in your car during the #TDF2023.

🗣️ Grab the handlebars and drive with the voice of Thomas right here 👉 https://t.co/qpU7T4BlXu@waze_Francepic.twitter.com/hUNSiAbC4t

— Tour de France™ (@LeTour) June 27, 2023

Which, if we know anything about Tommy V, will mean that over the next month drivers in France will be excitedly advised to slow down to a crawl before accelerating sharply, then told to weave erratically across the road, blaring their horn and sticking their tongue out at passing pedestrians in the process, while running out of fuel within touching distance of home.

(Sure that’s just a normal day’s driving in the UK, I hear you cry.)

The news that the darling of the French public for over a decade is on hand to make driving a much more pleasant and enjoyable experience has excited more than a few cyclists, with cycling writer Tom Owen noting on Twitter that this is the “first time in my adult life I’ve wished I could drive”.

The man, the myth, the sat nav voice provider

However, others are less impressed with the Tour’s latest partnership with something motoring-related.

“Waze is the app that enables speeding drivers to cut through quiet neighbourhoods, where kids are normally playing on bikes,” wrote cycling activist Harry Gray.

> Waze called out for directing drivers onto closed roads in parks

Back in 2021, you may recall, The Royal Parks publicly contacted the sat nav software app, which is a subsidiary of Google, to stop them from directing motorists down closed roads in parks.

The charity tweeted Waze with a screenshot that showed a route directing drivers through Richmond Park, which is a renowned hotspot for cyclists in the English capital.

Perhaps Tommy Voeckler was just looking to hang out with his mates?